Fútbolita

Just because the photo makes Cescy look like he’s literally basking in the grandeur of it all, we decided to post it for your enjoyment.

Anyway, Real Mierda are really getting on everyone’s nerves aren’t they? Ever since Harry Potter Perez announced his candidacy to be the club’s president, everyone from monsieur Arsene Wenger to the gardener’s cat has been linked to a move to the Bernabeu next season. But fear not because he’s probably going to ignore Perez’s text messages and naughty gifts on Facebook. No one takes the post of ‘Real Madrid coach’ seriously anymore. It’s like a part-time job. Grandma Juande knows that. Why do you think they found red lace in the dressing room?

On the Arsenal fans, monsieur said : “It makes me feel appreciated and even more regretful that we couldn’t give them what they wanted this season. I am very respectful for their faith in me. It’s very warming and it makes me even more determined to pay them back.”

Why can’t Ancelotti do the same? He’s playing mind games with the fans! But everyone should watch and learn from Mourinho.

Quick! Someone get this kid his Fruit Loops or he’ll get pissed!

Anyway, today’s a big day for the Arsenal niños because they will meet Foreignchester United at Old Trafford. They’re the only EPL side we genuinely love so we hope they do themselves proud.

“We have built a young team because we wanted to develop a special way of playing, a special spirit. We think when the players have been educated together from the age of 16-24 there is something special that I hope will come out at this level of the competition,” said Monsieur Wenger.

As a bonus, here are some photos. Fashionista Arshavin’s hair is gleaming in the glorious sunlight – how ferosh!