Fútbolita

For a moment, Diego forgot about the team he was playing for (“Boa gol, Dinho! grande abraço!”) Then, he caught Felipe Melo giving him the evil eye on the pitch – and that was it! 3-0 to Milan, and you don’t even know if Juve bothered to turn up at their own stadium at all.

To be fair, neither side was doing much in the first ten minutes, but despite the Rossoneri’s inadequacy - including Ambrosini’s “speed”, Beckham’s disappearance and Pirlo’s bad corners – UncleDude Nesta pulled one for his side while The Dinho (yes, we told you everyone will be scrambling to show off this year) netted in a double!! El Pato was out fretting over his injury on the roller coaster ride, so perhaps their attacking prowess was a little tamed. But in the second half, Milan actually improved and controlled the game – and although they weren’t at their best, Juventus and Amauri proved that they were indeed, better off prawn fishing

Poor Ciro. Now the Italian press are sharpening their pencils and ready to attack! “I don’t feel in danger of losing my job, I am very concentrated. I am trying to put my energy into the team. It is not my decision to make if they sack me or not, and if I am sacked I will accept it,” said tio Ferrara after the game.

via Reuters

Incrível! We guessed right… and Milan pulled off a shock 3-2 win over the Madridistas thanks to Pato’s killer last night. He’s going home to cry on his webcam now, but he can do whatever he wants! O Stef, bring out the candles… two goals against Real Moneda is something to scream about. Judging from the match last night, desculpe but Kaka didn’t shine as much as ya’ll expected. The Rossoneri actually played with some heart last night – save for The Dinho’s pathetic pace and Dida’s mistakes (actually, other than that, he wasn’t sleeping)

Also, we’ve established that Raul The Great One needs join King Juan Carlos’s court as a jester because his acting skills supersede that of Al Pacino. The Pied Piper of Higuain is a million times better than him and would have created more opportunities. Breaking out into a fight with Nesta was totally unnecessary. Quit being arrogant – you’re the capitano!

Said Kaka : “It was an evening full of many emotions. I found many (of) friends on the field. But the result was not good – we wanted to win. Right now we lack an identity - I knew Milan and I did not expect a team in disarray. Of course I was surprised to see them so aggressive in the beginning. As for Pato, he’s only twenty years and as I said, do not give him too many responsibilities: Give him time and you will see his talents. Tonight, he made he clear what he could do.”

Also, did you see how Pirlo and Ambrosini anticipated Kaka’s movements on the field? They are grandfathers all right, but they did not forget those six years Ricky spent training at Milanello!

Italy’s most-loved gangsta’ is back and ready to play a full match! Futbolita Betsy reminded us about the Milan tour in USA in July, so all of you who’re attending the game must remember to bring napkins for Gattuso when you see him.

Anyway, poor Paolo Maldini has to spend his final season fending off rants about his team’s injury misfortunes. “I think that we would’ve been competitive without injuries to Nesta, Gattuso, Kaladze, Abbiati, and Borriello. With two or three purchases we can aim for great targets,” he said.

When was the last time Nesta played for the Rossoneri? With all that free time, he probably set up a Chess Club with the Curva Sud folks.

And the other epic quote of the week has to be Gattuso’s : “When I wanted to leave, our vice-president Adriano Galliani and Ancelotti locked me in Milan’s trophy room and convinced me to stay.”