Fútbolita

The Female Football Voice. Voz femenina de fútbol.

So the million dollar question for you Greaseañies today is – WOULD YOU TAP THAT? Well, mano looked pretty clean cut at at the launch of his “I’m wearing this for the World Cup” Nike boot launch yesterday. And the Portugal jacket looks ridiculously comfortable (almost like the blue/white selecao bootcamp ones!) Anyway, he also revealed that he speaks to Kaka a lot because they understand a common language and they both share hope for a Brazil/Portugal final on July 11. Você acredita? (do you believe?)

Here’s another brilliant Crackovia episode again – this time featuring two Barca presidential candidates on their way to watch Barca play Stuttgart. Nunez and Gaspart approach the counter to purchase a ticket at the airport – but Nunez is taken aback at the price. You’ll love his classic reaction!

We were surprised at Senhor Julio Cesar’s poor eye injury last night. It kinda reminded us of Rustu Recber, the intimidating Turkish goalkeeper who happens to be our amiga’s favourite goalie of all time – don’t ask. Anyway, it’s high time we applaud the Inter manos for their hard work – particularly Lucio, who has been hailed by the Brazilian press for his performance against Chelski last night. Also, what a stunner from Diegol…. and Cambiasso!!

via AFP, Reuters, tv3



Ok, we’re only posting this photo because the fabulous Cristianeeee is in it! But as always, the big news in women’s football today belongs to Marta “O Melhor” who has joined FC Gold Pride in the USA. She was formerly a player of Los Angeles Sol (where she did those awesome appearances with Kobe) but sadly, LA Sol’s potential new owners backed out at the last minute as a result, their players had to look for other teams. Unfortunately, no one resembling Roman AbramoRich stepped up to the plate. Anyway, ya’ll know Marta will continue to rock wherever she plays! Ela é incrível!

The Spanish tabloids caught up with Guti at some event where they asked him one of the Cheesiest Questions Alive aka “Do you feel like falling in love (again)?” Con toda seriedad, who asks that?! Even your toes are cringing… admit it. Anyway, equally cheesy Guti answered the journalist: “Who does not (like it)? Not you?” Oh damn, where’s CQC Brasil when you need them? You know they would’ve said something classic about falling in love with his eyebrows….

Anyway, the background to all this is that Guti and his wife, Arancha are divorced with two kids. Since then, he has been linked to a bevy of mujers including university student, Paula, Spanish actress Amaia Salamanca and someone he was photographed with in Miami. Apparently, the girl just wanted The Fame, like Gago Gaga. “I met her, we (were together) for a few days and she seemed like a good girl, but wanting to be rich or famous with a picture of me is ridiculous,” he said. Pim Pam Pim Pam!

via FC Gold Pride, Hola


So Sao Paulo’s resident funnyman Hernanes, is looking at three proposals from top clubs in Europe and is finally, finally, ready to leave Brazil for European shores. After that Barca hoo-ha last year, he says : “I’m 24 to 25 years, and I think that now is time. I’m trying to stay calm. If not now, I am still happy here in Sao Paulo. I cannot get anxious.” Who is he kidding? AC, Inter, Barcelona and even CSKA Moscow are closely monitoring him.

We say… ir a AC, Hernanes!. They need you more than ever although Uncle Fester may try to be funny on your first day on the job and you will get random MMS messages from Botox Berlusconi. Fa tutto parte di un esperimento, as they say.


Speaking of AC, they didn’t too well against Udinese last night, losing 0-1 and getting themselves eliminated from the Coppa Italia. Why on Earth is Pippo attempting to do a bicycle-kick when he knows that it’s not one of his strengths?

Anyway, the game marked the return of Abbiati after a ten-month layoff (Senhor Leonardo and his faith in people!) which meant that Dida could only sit at Milanello by himself playing Monopoly : Edição do Brasil.

“My family has been close to me during this tough period, as well as all my friends. I have a good rapport with (Leonardo) and he knows that I am at the club’s disposal, because they have given me so much,” declared Abbiati.

Oh, talk about former employees! Here’s Kaka and Carol enjoying a nice snog at the Alicia Keys concert last week. AS IF we could write anything else to justify this picture! (Thanks, Verdi) And you know their son, Baby Luca, rolls his eyes whenever this happens in the family kitchen.


My my, what do we have here? It’s Elano scooping the lovely snow up with his wheelbarrow. And this is no playground, futbolitas. It’s his own backyard in Istanbul, Turkey! Oh, how we wished all our backyards looked like this. It’s nice to pretend to be a Snow Samaritan sometimes, especially if you’re trying to break into Dopey’s squad and can’t manage hat-tricks every week. But what are we talking about? Elano helped Galatasaray to a 5-1 thrashing of Denizli Belediye on Sunday. Então … acho que você é super cool agora, cara? He must now create and score every week as April’s squad-selection date looms closer!

As we’ve said before, men who dress well are our weaknesses. Check out Sergio Ramos as he disembarked from Madrid’s plane which landed in Albania. Gurlllll looks like he’s parading down the D&G runway and heading off to Project Ponyway to be on the judging panel. Ferosh!!! Can’t say the same about Jerzy Dudek, though. There are rumours that Gattuso’s restaurant needs a fish-chopping assistant. As for Raul The Great One, okay… we’ll leave it at that before the haters come prancing at us with a Heidi Montag poster.

Anyway, Madrid were in Albania to play in a friendly game or the “Taci Oil Cup”. Of course they won the game 2-1 (Potter Perez would not have tolerated anything less), Fernando Gago played and the screaming Albanian fans went home happy from the Qemal Stafa Stadium.

So Argentina’s Oscar Ruggeri is really annoyed that Argentina’s team manager, Carlos Bilardo is being a bitch and not allowing him to assume the role as The Dona’s assistant coach.

“I did everything I had to do to be in the national squad. I talked to Savino, with Grondona, with Bilardo. I’m still waiting,” said Ruggeri. “A year ago I hoped to be in the selection. A year ago I was quiet and spoke to people on the bench. I think it’s unfair. (Julio) Grondona knows how I handled 11 years in the National Team. I defended the shirt, for me it was my life.”

via AP, David Anchuelo and Globo


Noticias : Juve, Romario & Your Fav Pin-Up!

Oh finally, Diego and friends are starting to win… for the love of Ciro and Juve! We were starting to believe that the insults thrown at everyone from Felipe Melo to the boardroom were never going to end. But perhaps Napoli threw them a 3-0 lifeline (ok, in calcio Italia, no one ever throws you a lifeline…) which led to Del Piero’s and Diego’s goal.

Finally, here we have Greaseano WORKINGGG IT it for Armani! His eyebrows are trying to send a message to you in that photo so ya’ll better focus! The city of Milan is preparing itself for the larger-than-life ads to replace the Beckhams and before you grab that sandwich, do enjoy Greaseano’s abs and remind yourself that the mayo is never a good idea.

Meanwhile, Romario has been spotted all around Rio in his Ferrari with David Brazil, a famous club promoter in the country. We’re getting bad vibes from this photo, but really, they’re best friends more than anything else so there’s no need to dig up all those old clippings about Ronaldo Lima and the transvestites! And yes, they are really striking a ‘pose’ for ya!

via Ego, Ambito, Reuters


Noticias

It looks like zio Ranieri is getting himself all worked up – or rather, excited – over the possibility of the ToniTotti pairing for Roma this weekend against Genova. He even compared the spectacle to Drogba’s favourite film, Avatar! Ok, we made that last bit up about your beloved Diving genius, but whatever you say, Tsu’tey the clan leader is still his twin.

“There are more expectations to see Totti-Toni than (the opening of) ‘Avatar’ itself” said Ranieri. By the way, the film opens to the Italian public on Friday and you know Marcello Lippi already bought his 3-D glasses in hopes of seeing the tribe’s princess in all her blueness. “Let’s hope that the captain recovers (from tendinitis). When he is fit, will talk about how he can play for Roma,” added Ranieri.

One of Argentina’s starlets, Eduardo “Toto” Salvio is set to become an Atletico Madrid player… and yes, he’s touted to be Kun Aguero’s replacement (so that he can finally make that dream move to wherever he wants). Los colchoneros fans must be thrilled!

It cost 8 million to bring Toto to the club (caro, tal vez?) because his former club, Lanús charged EUR 6.8 million and the Argentine Football Association paid an additional 1.2 million euros. The rest will be paid in installments and the player arrives in Madrid on Friday. Toto is probably frantically packing away now, knowing that neither Forlan nor Kun will not be sharing their toothpaste tubes with him!

The Barca Elections are back and while the club’s vice-president, Jaume Ferrer, has declared that he wants to run for position of president this year, Joan Laporta feels “hurt to learn this from the media” instead of from Ferrer directly. “Of course we not limit the choices of anyone to be president and we have already discussed this,” Laporta said.

One interesting addition to the Barca elections if the grand-daughter of the club’s founder itself, Emma Gamper. She will be backing candidate Jaume Guixà, who is also running for presidency. “ Is a great thrill for any (of us) to have the legacy of Joan Gamper in their ranks and I have this privilege,” said Guixa.

As always… here’s a spoof from the Crackovia folks about Sandro Rosell - the club’s former director, who is also running for president. Genial!

via Reuters, El Mundo Deportivo


After weeks of rally and support, it has now emerged that River Plate’s promising midfielder, Diego Buonanotte may be discharged from the hospital in two days following his horrifying car accident which claimed the lives of his three friends.

“He’s a very peaceful guy, he’s not a “night-man” and he was not drunk. It was a tragedy, his friends died and nobody expected that. He was so sad and I couldn’t believe it. I hopes he can get over this and find peace in his life,” says a River Plate futbolita, Sabrina, 18 from Buenos Aires.

“Everything went as planned for the operation. Now, we can only wait for his recovery,” said Pedro Hansen, River’s medical chief. As they say in Argentina, Fuerza Diego!

Meanwhile, Greaseano has hit back at Osasuna fans who yelled vulgarities at him at Real’s last game, including the evergreen “hijo puta es” and “Cristiano muérete!” It’s rare to want to be on his side, but this time, we must say that he gets the last laugh.

“Being made unwelcome (during matches) is normal to me. I’ve been there many times in England and ended up being voted the best player in the world.” Ouch!

Look who scored in Milan’s 5-2 thrashing of Genoa last night? The Italian Stallion, himself, Boriello…. and (brace yourselves), Huntelaar! All we can say is they both did a good job of covering for Pato while he was out spreading garlic butter with Sthef. As for Huntelaar, scoring via penalty doesn’t constitute much, but it’s still a goal and unless you do something else, no one is going to be very impressed. At least he did better than The Dinho, who failed to convert a spot-kick… but listen, Thiago Silva scored too OK?

Il Davide featured in the game too (of course) and Leonardo said he “trained in all positions” due to the unexpected injuries prior to the game. So how do things look for Juventus this weekend, then, uomini?

via Reuters, Wenn & Ole


Ah, someone’s ego has been bruised! And it’s none other than your favourite Cabezazo or headbutter, Materazzi!! Since he’s merely shaking his legs at Inter these days, all talk of the World Cup is practically irrelevant to him. Well, not like the tournament needs a crying circus anyway.“I know where I will be on June 11, the day of the first match of the  World Cup: in my trailer traveling in America. I will not be watching the tournament (and I do not know the time (of the matches),” Materazzi declared to La Repubblica. Run along then, Cabebazo!

So Tio ThunderThighs, better known as Roberto Carlos was unveiled as an official Corinthiano alongside his own figurine yesterday. At least the figurine looked more tolerant than the man himself. Anyway, tio will now play alongside his best friend from 2002, Ronaldo Lima… and they will now proceed to spend more weekends watering plants together. “Ronaldo is not my friend, he is my brother. I lived longer with him than with my own family,” ThunderThighs said. He then added : “Listening to this mass (of people) screaming my name is creepy. The reward will be given on the field.”

Here’s another classic New Year’s eve Crackòvia episode. This one features the characters of Guti and Ramos ringing in 2010 by eating 12 grapes, dancing to techno (as usual) and dressing up in… cloaks! Espanyol’s Raul Tamudo (the same character who played Leo Messi) also enforced this tradition on his guests, Nakamura and goalie, Carlos Kameni. And if you observe Tamudo’s sofa lining carefully, it’s draped with a Real Madrid banner!

You’ve seen him flop at Bayern… but did you see the Luca Toni Going Away party that he threw before his move to Roma? Here it is! With plenty of booze and a light-headed Ribery. At least his new Roma boss, Ranieri Doubtfire loves him. “He is in better shape than I expected. He will now play against Cagliari. Roma is different with Luca Toni,” he declared.

via Reuters, TV3 and Gazetta dello Sport


  • You and I know that 2010 will be a bloody exciting year for futbol - so if you aren’t counting down to the symphony of vuvuzelas in South Africa already, you’d better start inmediatamente! Happy New Year’s Day, futbolitas.

  • Guess who desperately needs to start the year on a clean slate? It’s none other than… Luca Toni! After complaining about  being underused and mistreated by Mistress van Gaal at Bayern, Italy’s Most Awkward striker has now officially joined AS Roma on loan until June 30. Obviously, he’s banking on that transfer to help him get into Lippi’s World Cup squad. Oh for the love of Ranieri, is this man deluded? Someone will have to air courier us a live cactus if Luca gets called up!
  • Lookey! Another Brazilian has joined Arsenal on a long-term deal. It’s the U-17 meninho, Wellington and the Gunners have bought him from Fluminense for a cool $10 million. Of course, Wellington is still considered a fetus (much like Coutinho) so he’ll remain in Brazil until he turns 18. And as they say, experience is key so he’ll have to win as much as he can with Fluminense (cue the collective snorts!) before officially becoming Denilson’s BFF in London.
  • Yes, you’re looking at specially-commissioned stamps of Zizou in aid of the ELA – a European foundation against Leukodystrophy (a genetic disease which attacks the nervous system). We must say that Zizi resembles the handsome French actor types in these portraits and no, we’re not referring to Gerard Depardieu…. how dare you! Oui, des amis, Zizi’s more like the type who murders the heroine and gets away scot-free in a movie because he’s just so suave. Ah, when did it all come to this, you say? Je ne sais pas!
  • The man who is capable of causing a fire alarm to set off at a fertility clinic aka Senhor Mourinho has declared that he’s fighting a “lost war” with Italian journalists. Awww, cari colleghi (dear colleagues) – what have you done now?! “I do not feel uncomfortable in this country. When I say I am (not loved) here, I am referring to my relationship with the media. For me, it is the fault of journalists (but) for them, it’s my fault,” he said.”In that sense, I know it is a lost war from the beginning, because journalists are many and I am only one. I lose this war, but not my independence, my way of being politically correct and always saying what I think. But I think with a little more respect we can move on.”

via AFP, Abola, Reuters


Alan Kardec is now officially a Benfica player! Of course you remember him… he’s the U-20 Brazil wanderkid from Vasco. Yes, there are thousands (and probably millions) of “Brazilian Wanderkids” but damn, tipo over here is a fineeeee one! Anyway, upon his arrival in Lisbon yesterday, Kardec spent 2 hours at the airport finalizing legal documents and unfortunately, did not grant interviews to any of journalists. But that’s because none of them were wearing bikinis!

Ah, lovely! Senhor Mourn-In-HoHo was at Stamford Bridge to witness Diving Drogba in action last night. Ever the hardworking coach, Mourinho is already taking notes prior to their Champions League encounter with Chelski next February. This man is a workaholic and you can almost imagine him saying, “Please don’t call me arrogant but in Jose world, there is no room for mistakes.” Oh please, in Jose world, there will be a special corner selling Ballackwursts, Ibrahimovic posters at half-price and CDS containing trance remixes of “I think I’m the special one” How can you not be arrogant if you have all that?!


That’s Kun Aguero in happier days… before he pulled a Tiger Woods on Gianinna, of course. Sometimes, all you gotta do is to stop being a Douche and everything can be normal again. And perhaps things are looking up for Kun (maybe not in the national team – if The Dona really believes that blood is thicker than water) according to the latest round of gossip.

Now, it seems that Potter Perez wants to bring Kun to Real Madrid next July and is willing to shell out €60 million to see him wear white. He doesn’t mind Villa either – but it seems pretty unlikely at this point. As for Kun, in order to complete Phase 3 of the glitzy Bachelor lifestyle, he must move to the Bernabeu. Because, que es lo que quieres, verdad?

via Xabierpita, Reuters and A Bola



The Dona is missing! Don’t bother… he’s just hiding somewhere in Barcelona. He’s supposed to be serving a suspension until January 15, remember? And now that his C-team is playing a friendly against Catalonia two days before Christmas, the Argentinean press is reporting that he’s been seen everywhere but the pitch. Yeah, that means he’s holed up in his hotel room with nothing but WII.

Anyway, whatever he’s doing in Barcelona (seriously), he’s not allowed to eat with the players or come into contact with them – except through his aides. And still, The Dona is walking around wearing the official training kit. If you see him, don’t forget to ask him about Kun Aguero.


Meanwhile, Milan’s Uncle Fester Galliani has declared Marco van Basten as AC Milan’s “Best Signing Ever”. Well, they asked him about Sheva, Pato and Kaka but he doesn’t seem all that impressed with them.

“When you make assessments of this kind you need to consider value for money. For we paid 7 million euros, but there is another signing that I feel is unbeatable and I speak of a certain Dutchman. If Pato wins ten golden balls, then it would be different, but until then Van Basten will remain our best buy,” he said.

It’s the Luis Fabiano Rap by a cara named Professor Pablo. Well, of course he deserves his own song… they should play this during the team birthdays!


Probably the most exciting news of all for the Milan tifosi is the fact that Gangsta Gattuso has extended his contract till 2012! Forget Man City, he’s going to stay and fight. And obviously, the general consensus is that everyone is excited… except Mark Hughes of course. “In this way, with a few lines on paper, all insecurities and doubts are swept away because some loves are stronger even with (other) concerns,” wrote the folks over at AC Milan, following the signing of the contract. Yes, this is truly an opera.

So the Green Point City stadium located in the heart of Cape Town is now open for business! This is where one of the semi-final matches of the World Cup will be played at and it has a capacity of 68,000. Well, it looks a tad bit like the Bernabeu – although we aren’t really experts on stadium architecture, we hope to see Puyol or Fabulousooo there next June. They’d better be there, we’re loading up our water guns already.

So Pepe has been sidelined for six months due to a torn cruciate ligament in his knee. He will undergo surgery next week and the recovery process is expected to be a very dull and long one. After all, it’s Real Madrid and in six months, you can travel to the moon and back, fall out of favour with Raul, persuade Billy Joel sing with Gago and release a blockbuster film about Potter Perez’s legacy featuring Bruce Willis. Hey, but at least everybody loves Pepe. Check out the messages for him : -

Marcelo: “You know how much I love you, brother. You will return soon because you are strong and because this team misses you. Just wait to see how quickly you’ll be up and running again.”

Casillas: “Pepe, we love you very much. All are thoughts are with you. You are a great player and person. This team will fight for you. Get well soon.”

Cristiano Ronaldo: “Stay strong, Pepe. Come back soon. We love you a lot.”

Ramos: “We are here for you, brother. The greats always come back, and you are one of them. We hope to see you soon. Strength and patience.”

via AP, Globo, AFP


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Bayern may have qualified for the Champs League (quello che è successo, Juve?!) but Luca Toni is saying goodbye for real, and van Gaal himself has already returned his Laura Pausini CD to the striker.

“I have nothing else to talk to Luca Toni about. He has made it clear he wants to leave Bayern Munich, therefore, he can start looking for a new club. It is too late to come up with excuses now. He should have thought about it before. He decided to behave in a (certain way) and he did not achieve what we (planned) for him and therefore, there is no more place for him in Bayern Munich,” said the coach.

According to German newspapers, West Ham, Fenerbahce, Roma and Inter Milan have shown in the attacker. And yes, he does want to go back to Italy but Luca, you do not want to incur the wrath of Jose Mourinho!

Yes, that’s Diego looking all morose and arty. And you can’t really blame him. Tipos failed to find their footing in the most important European competition. Their elimination and humiliating 4-1 loss to Bayern screams utter humiliation! What about all those purchases they made? Melooooo!!!

“It’s hard to find words because in this case there is very little to say and so much to do,” admitted Del Piero.  “There is not only one culprit, it is not who is more or less guilty. We all equally share the blame with no exceptions and we will all fight together to get out of this situation.”

Before you start getting excited over that photo (thanks Somosche), we must tell you that David Albelda’s sense of humour is pretty darn awesome. And in case you haven’t heard, he’s got the personality of a 8 year old boy whose joy can be found in a Kinder Egg.

Anyway, as ya’ll know, Real and Valencia will face off this weekend and David Silva has been ruled out of the game due to his injury. So of course, they had to ask Albelda a few cliché questions at the pre-match conference.

We do not have Silva and we are not taking the pain in the ass every day!” Albelda declared. He was also asked about the absence of Ronaldo at the Mestalla (after receiving a double booking) The reporters laughed his response but he added fuel to the fire by saying : “Do not laugh, it’s true, dammit!

via El Pais, Reuters, AP and Somosche


Noticias

  • What’s with the Wolverine look? He looks 91 instead of 19… tipo needs a razor blade. Now! Unfortunately, Milan only managed a 1-1 draw against Marseille last night. The good thing is that Boriello scored (and has been doing a great deal of that lately). As a result, we’ve been left to eat our own words… è triste.

    “I am very relaxed and above all happy to be playing again, as six weeks ago I was in the stands,” declared Boriello. “Now I am playing, scoring goals and since I came back the team hasn’t lost a game. It’s great to feel the faith of the fans and the Coach. I can hear they call my name more when I step on to the field.” Alas, they were actually yelling “Boboboring…!”

  • Meanwhile, Rafaella Fico’s boyfriend (according to her), the Greaseano himself, made his long-awaited return to futbol last night against FC Zurich. Yes, rapaz is desperately in need of a tan but everything else looks in place. The Pied Piper of Higuain scored the only goal last night and as usual, it was a beauty. Oi Pellegrini, forget Raul The Great One… start Pipita in all the games with Benzema!

  • Remember when Cirque du Soleil welcomed The Dinho backstage a few months back? Well,  Nene, the Brazilian striker from Monaco was also recently invited backstage to hang out with the performers from the awesome circus troupe. Said the former Palmeiras man : “I met four Brazilians who work as artists and coordinate the show. They complimented me and said they are very happy that a Brazilian is the top scorer of the French Championship.” Clowns are the best!!
  • via marabelo (Youtube), Reuters & Globo


  • Senor Pep, who looks exhausted from having to bring his daughters to the horrid premiere of New Moon over the weekend wants you to know that even without the Messiah, Ibracadabra and Iniesta, Barca can defeat Inter tonight. Many will call it wishful thinking… but come on! “They are two very important players, but I do not buy the idea that we will be less without Ibra and Messi,” he said. “We’ll compete to win eleven-to-eleven against Inter.”

    Come to think of it, Geri Pique will be a perfect addition to cast of Twilight (Pique as Jacob Black, is that you?). He’s got the smouldering vampire look that will put the likes of Robert-I-don’t-shampoo-my-hair-Pattyson to shame!

  • Everyone from sullen-faced cab drivers to the lazy policemen in our neighbourhood can’t stop talking about Titipo Henry’s handball. And now, Lord of the Rings star, referee Pierluigi Collina has given his two cents on the issue. Sadly, he’s trying to be on the fence about this one. “Henry’s case is striking because it has contributed to the fact that one nation has gone to the World Cup. It is not difficult to understand what happened. The point of contact takes a few hundredths of a second and you may not have seen it (on the cameras).” Ei zio, cosa stai dicendo?!! Who is he trying to kid?

  • Finally, a sighting of Arsenal’s Mr. Guapo aka Carlos Vela! He’s been out injured for a while now, so it’s nice to see him with Cescy at training again. They’ll take on R. Standard de Liège later tonight and el capitano is pretty happy with the way things are. “I have learnt a lot since I was named captain,” he said. “At the beginning it was a bit difficult, but I feel more capable than a year ago. I know my responsibility, my job and I feel everyone is helping and supporting me. I’m looking forward to a great season with Arsenal.” Way to go!
  • And in case you were wondering what happened to Ronaldo Lima, here he is trying to run away from Brazilian paparazzi a few days ago after a nice lunch with local singer, Wanessa. Well, he thought he could outdo them all by running out the front door where a Jesus Luz clone was waiting…. but he was mistaken! Eles são mais espertos do que você, cara!

via Ego, Reuters and Gettyimages


Noticias

  • For the love of Kun, the Rojiblancos have been slapped with a fine of 150 euros (about the cost of a decent La Liga ticket these days). Anyway, RFEF meted out that small punishment after Atletico’s fans were said to have thrown objects at Pellegrini from the stands during the Madrid derby on November 7.

    “In the 66th minute, the game was stopped for about a minute, because the visiting coach, Manuel Luis
    Pellegrini, had to be handled by the Medical Services, suffering from a blow to the face caused allegedly by an object thrown from the stands,” read a report.
    Lo siento chicos, esto es serio!
  • So apparently, Robin van Persie is heading off to Serbia to treat his injury with placenta. Sounds absurd, but believe us, we’ve heard worst. Cara is going all traditional now, as you can see but as long as Arshavin doesn’t start sticking voodoo dolls around into faux Christian Dior dollhouses, we’re still ok!
  • Poor RobinHood Amauri had to defend himself after Sampdoria’s Pazzini acted like a selfish brat on Monday. “My decision to play for Italy with or without a passport was made one year ago. I always respected everyone’s opinion, even that of Pazzini, and I want my respect: I chose Italy for a year, rather than Brazil,” he declared. That’s it, Amauri! The Brazilians will not like you for saying that so be careful! A few Italian futbolitas are already showing resentment towards Amauri….
  • There was a lot of controversy that followed the selecao’s 2-0 win over Oman yesterday in honour of the sultan’s birthday. First, journalists in the mixed zone had to fight with security guards who allowed the sultan’s relatives and guests to roam freely near the changing rooms. Some journalists were beaten and even exchanged shoves with security guards who guarded the door. How unnecessary and incredibly RUDE!

    The last time that happened to us, a friend from the selecao came to our rescue (Agradeço a Deus!) The trick is to scream at 92 decibels. Also, who cares if you’re royalty? It’s pathetic that they can’t teach their children any basic manners – they were tugging at Lucio’s shirt while he was doing an interview and he looked disturbed (você está inculto?).


Noticias

  • So Marca gave out one of their futbol awards yesterday in an attempt to find out who’d be the next hombre to join Potter Perez’s gang. Both Diego Forlan and David Villaaaaa received the “Pichichi” award for their service to their clubs and national team respectively. Victor Valdes was totally checking out Villa’s hair gel and you know he thinks his “Zamora” award is a big joke because he won’t be a Madrid man anytime soon. Why else is Wedgeillas still Spain’s #1 choice? As for the Valencia hitman…. ¿Por qué tan serio, David??? Ok, at least he’s smiling here….
  • The Brazilian U-17 meninos will face Mexico later tonight, after struggling to beat Japan 3-2. Lucho Nizzo’s man struggled against Japan – despite Neymar’s goal – and needed two own goals to secure a victory.  Ei, acordar caras!! Stop thinking about your girlfriends and your Xbox 360s back at home. Bring home the cup first!
  • Maradona Beer! Does anybody want some? It’s called the “10 Maradó” and is the brainchild of (drumroll)… a Mexican named Roberto de Alba. He says that The Dona hasn’t gotten back to him on franchising the name yet… but this is one beer you wouldn’t want to export to Brazil.

  • Kaka, Greaseano and Raul The Great One paid a tribute to Markus, the nephew of former Real Madrid player Pedro de Felipe, who is suffering from celebral palsy. The best message came from Xabi Alonso : “The person who buys this shirt will be doing something very important for a child. This has no price. A big hug from Xabi Alonso.” Awww!

Photos via Reuters, Globo & Elisa Estrada


Noticias

  • So The Dona has an ongoing fued with Carlos Bilardo as we all know but it looks like the matter has escalated to beyond childish. Yes, he is now accusing Bilardo of “trying to overthrow Argentinean Football President, Julio Grondona.” Grandpa, you need to sit down. “There is a campaign against Grondona. Daniel Vila (manager of a local news business) and Bilardo wanted his place and now, they’ve ignored me for what I said about the match,” he said.
  • Speaking of The Dona, his yerno’s team, Atletico Madrid, were humiliated 4-0 by Chelski yesterday. What is going down, tipos?! Said Atletico’s Antonio Lopez : “We know that our fans will be annoyed, but now more than ever we need their support. It hurts, we had high hopes for this game and have been training well every day. We had chances before we conceded and we failed to take them and then every chance they had, they scored.” Wake up, folks.
  • During the Spanish third-division game between Badajoz and Extremadura last Sunday, one of their injured players Emilio Pinto from Badajoz was carried off the field on top of a door. What? No stretcher?

Photo via Reuters


Noticias

  • Are you ready for this? The folks at Marca amusingly invented an ‘award’ for Kaka so that he’d come to their editorial offices and give em a scoop! You know they’d been waiting AGES for this day to arrive. “I will try to score as many goals as I can against Milan. But I will not celebrate them,” he said. “It’s the first time I will play against a former team. For me it is a historic match, but I really want to score, because I am a professional. I want to win because we need this victory also.” Scoring and not celebrating? That will be hard! Meanwhile, the Duckling can’t wait to play against Madrid because it’s a ‘dream come true’.
  • Pirates of the Caribbean star, Veron (ok, we couldn’t resist) has declared that he is behind The Dona one hundred percent. Oh tio, stop sucking up! You’ve already qualified. “Maradona has to follow in office until the World Cup. He has qualified and it is not good to (quit),” he told Chilean newspapers.
  • Oh nooo! Your favorite Portuglish speaking coach Joel Santana has stepped down from his post as South Africa’s coach after a run of bad results. They have lost eight of their last nine matches under Santana. We were looking forward to all the epic post-match interviews. Damn…someone else must hire him now!
  • There are no Italian players in this year’s Ballon d’Or… but we see Yoann! They need to come up with a proper shortlist. This looks like names for a yearbook photo.

  • Look what we have here. It’s Dani Alves the Goalkeeper! The Barca defender had a fairly easy training session yesterday with the rest of the squad, in preparation to face Rubin Kazan tonight. Meanwhile, Ibracadabra is doubtful for the clash but don’t throw him nasty looks. He did not go clubbing!
Photos via Marca, Getty


Noticias

  • So Argentina qualified for the World Cup and Tevez looks confused. Seriously, though, why does The Dona look like he’s being pushed around? How dare you! We can almost imagine the amused look on everyone’s faces at the press conference after hearing this : “Our victory is going to all Argentineans, except the journalists. They [journalists] treat me like dirt, but we qualified with honor. I dedicate this to all of the Argentinean people and my family, but one sector does not deserve it [referring to journalists] because they treated me like garbage. They invented fights with [Carlos] Bilardo, among other things.” Awwww Maradona, stop crying now! Someone get the pacifier…
  • Meanwhile, Selecao Sexbombs played out to a boring 0-0 draw against Venezuela. Because obviously everyone put all their effort into Oranje Kaka VS Miranda Blues. Nilmar thinks it’s ok. “The important thing is that everyone fought, and the fans supported until the end,” he said. Also, we found the best dress ever for all you chicas! Check it out below.
  • Nani (heh), Simao, Miguel and Edinho all netted in for Portugal yesterday as they thrashed Malta 4-0. Carlos Queiroz thinks ya’ll should have a little faith in them and in the power of Simao’s bum. “For sure some points lost at home made life difficult for us but the important thing is that we made it and now we have to prepare for these two finals,” he said.






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