Fútbolita

Boca and River are going through a really bad phase now… y no hay vuelta atrás. It’s almost like Barca and Real or Milan and Inter facing relegation together. Imagine that, spending a lifetime fighting off your enemy only to go down with him! Ah, this is almost like the Cold War.

Anyway, Boca lost 2-1 to Rosario while Lanús trounced the River boys 1-0. Qué tan doloroso para ellos! It must be painful to lie in 18th and 16th place respectively and are actually staring relegation in the face. And for the life of him, Martin Palermo (below) can’t figure out what’s going on either…

Oh dear, our chicas who attended the monster of a game between Boca and River Plate yesterday afternoon had to put up with the showers that descended upon La Bombonera! It was so bad they had to suspend the game… They should’ve just continued! Trust us, there’s nothing better than splashing around the pitch and standing under an umbrella with your photographer. A veces…tenemos que estar loco! Yes, we’re a little crazy.

Anyway, the score between the two giants still remains at 0-0 and referee Hector Baldassi was forced to stop play five minutes in to clear more streamers. Can you imagine that?! Tipo Palermo totally went home to cook himself a nice bowl of soup next to the fire.

After weeks of rally and support, it has now emerged that River Plate’s promising midfielder, Diego Buonanotte may be discharged from the hospital in two days following his horrifying car accident which claimed the lives of his three friends.

“He’s a very peaceful guy, he’s not a “night-man” and he was not drunk. It was a tragedy, his friends died and nobody expected that. He was so sad and I couldn’t believe it. I hopes he can get over this and find peace in his life,” says a River Plate futbolita, Sabrina, 18 from Buenos Aires.

“Everything went as planned for the operation. Now, we can only wait for his recovery,” said Pedro Hansen, River’s medical chief. As they say in Argentina, Fuerza Diego!

Meanwhile, Greaseano has hit back at Osasuna fans who yelled vulgarities at him at Real’s last game, including the evergreen “hijo puta es” and “Cristiano muérete!” It’s rare to want to be on his side, but this time, we must say that he gets the last laugh.

“Being made unwelcome (during matches) is normal to me. I’ve been there many times in England and ended up being voted the best player in the world.” Ouch!

Look who scored in Milan’s 5-2 thrashing of Genoa last night? The Italian Stallion, himself, Boriello…. and (brace yourselves), Huntelaar! All we can say is they both did a good job of covering for Pato while he was out spreading garlic butter with Sthef. As for Huntelaar, scoring via penalty doesn’t constitute much, but it’s still a goal and unless you do something else, no one is going to be very impressed. At least he did better than The Dinho, who failed to convert a spot-kick… but listen, Thiago Silva scored too OK?

Il Davide featured in the game too (of course) and Leonardo said he “trained in all positions” due to the unexpected injuries prior to the game. So how do things look for Juventus this weekend, then, uomini?

via Reuters, Wenn & Ole

¡Qué trágico! for poor Diego Buonanotte. If you haven’t heard, the influential River Plate midfielder was involved in a fatal car crash – which killed three of his friends on Saturday. And according to the Argentinean dailies, Diego, who is in the hospital now frequently wakes up in the middle of the night asking “what happened? what happened?” From time to time, Diego also asks to watch TV.

“In his state, he does not remember much about what happened. He knows that there was an accident, but not everything that happened. So we decided that we will (summon) a special group of psychologists and psychiatrists to address the situation. It will be between hospital professionals and River Plate,” explained Diego’s doctor, Horacio Cavaliere. He added that the recovery process will take at least seven months and he is optimistic because Diego “is a young boy, an athlete, who neither smokes nor drinks alcohol.”

Messages are streaming in from all corners of the world – mostly well-wishes from fans of River Plate who want a speedy recovery for him. Even their arch rivals, Boca Juniors said : “Fuerza Diego. We are with Buonanotte in this difficult time.”

They may be lying in 17th place in the Apertura standings but River Plate’s new museum in Buenos Aires is muy impresionante! Amigas, even George Lucas would be proud. It’s like walking into the set of a sci-fi flick, except the only overweight Jedi available to welcome you would be Cristian Fabbiani.

Anyway, the players partied hard into the night on Monday to celebrate the museum’s official opening. Players from “past and present” came to revel in the momentous occasion. While we’re sure no Boca fan would be caught dead buying tickets to this place, they will certainly find it hard to top that super time tunnel above. Time to change our flight agenda to Argentina….vamos allá!

via Globo

So in the end, Alfio Basile’s army weren’t able to obtain a crucial away victory against Los Millionares (how dare you mistake them for Chamillionaire!) but at least they came away with a 1-1 draw. As expected, El Monumental had all the ingredients for an emotional game and things got heated when Ariel Ortega hit his arm on Boca’s defender, Julio Caceres’ neck. The Paraguayan got pissed and was subsequently sent off for ‘retaliating’. Apparently, Ortega fell to the floor like a baby. For the love of The Dona, it’s a soap opera!!

Surprisingly, River dominated the first half of play and won a penalty but Boca’s keeper, Pato Abbondanzieri (they’re not all Webcam Kings, ok?) pulled off a fine save to keep the score 0-0. Then Marcelo Gallardo’s stunning free kick broke the deadlock…. es demasiado grande para las palabras! Martin Palermo levelled the score upon removing his phantom mask in the second half. Hah, Riquelme was wrong after all.

River’s Matías Abelairas, whose effort slipped off the post in the dying minutes of the game said :”I will not sleep. I will review the play several times. I tried to do my best and hit the ball first because two defenders were coming for me. I saw (the play) in the locker room, the summary … and I think I did the right thing … It was a matter of inches and I could not fulfill my dream: to score a goal against Boca.”

Well tipo, there’s always the next time.

Don’t you love it when futbolitos do that to the camera? We do! And Nicolas Gaitan has every reason to celebrate after scoring a brace in Boca’s 2-1 triumph over Tigre yesterday. Alfio Basile’s men have been fighting hard this season so we should stop calling him Ursula. Maybe he ought to pay Leonardo a visit… they can both enjoy celebratory drinks courtesy of Potter Perez.

Anyway, Los Xeneizes needed a win this week to take them through to the next game. After all, they will be meeting old foes River Plate next weekend. Well, they’re both nowhere at the top of the table, but everyone knows the rivalry is still fierce. Que no se puede negar que!

In Sunday’s other matches, Independiente drew 1-1 with Chacarita Juniors while Newell’s Old Boys defeated Estudiantes de La Plata 2-1.

via GettyImages

All the attention is on River Plate this weekend, but of course the best photos were from Los Xeneizes‘ camp. Martin Palermo and Gabriel Paletta are muy feliz and rightly so, after Boca were able to escape with a 2-1 win over Lanus without the services of Riquelme. Palmermo scored the winning goal!

In another game, River defeated newly-promoted Chacarita Juniors 4-3 thanks to goals from Diego Buonanotte and Gustavo Cabral’s header from a corner in the 32nd before their veteran striker Ariel Ortega fired the winner. Matias Alustiza leveled each time for Chacarita, finishing well in the 23rd and scoring a penalty in first-half injury time.

In other Sunday matches, Independiente won 4-2 away against Atletico Tucuman and Newell’s Old Boys beat Huracan 1-0 at home.

So the Argie press are hailing Guillermo Marino for saving Boca’s blushes when he came off the bench to score two goals yesterday against Argentinos Juniors. Riquelme was out on a one-match ban and as for Alfio Basile, it was his first official game in charge of these tipos. Still, Ursula was happy with the performance so far…

“The team did not do anything right in the first half and my players knew it. But luckily, after the talk in the locker room, they knew they had to play better,” he said.

Meanwhile, Boca’s rivals River Plate fell to a 2-0 defeat in the hands of Banfield after their two Uruguay strikers, Santiago Silva and Sebastian Fernandez netted in a goal each. As for San Lorenzo, one of Argentina’s “big five”, they beat Atletico de Tucuman 3-1 on Saturday.

River Plate are taking drastic measures to reduce the risk of the dreaded swine flu that has taken 44 lives in Argentina. In fact, they’re cancelling their last game of the season against Estudiantes de la Plata. What’s there to lose right? It’s the end of the Apertura championship and they lie in sixth place with zero chance of becoming champions.

They’ve also closed their head office until next Monday and the only time they will meet will be for a “nice meal together”, according to the club’s technical committee.

“I believe it was a very intelligent measure. The more precautions that are taken, the better,” River’s president told Argentinean daily, Ole.

They’ve also started placing “explanatory posters” in the players’ locker room. Y’know… the normal jizz. Like how to wash your hands to prevent bacteria and contamination. Shit, we’re sneezing now! Hasta pronto.

Oh, how we miss the good old Pablo Aimar and Valencia days! At least cara is happily settled at Portuguese side Benfica - and he’s also ready to welcome his former River Plate teammate, Javier Saviola to the club. It’s so obvious Saviola wasn’t in Raul The Great One’s good books when he was at Real Moneda. He spent the entire last season complaining about a lack of starts.

Anyway, the Benfica squad is in Lisbon now to begin pre-season training. The Portuguese press arrived at Portela yesterday but players were not allowed to speak to any of them.

“Sorry, I can’t even speak. They told us (not) to say anything,” Aimar said repeatedly but when asked about Saviola, he added: “I am very happy that he’s coming to Benfica. Saviola is a great player.”

As for Saviola, he’s clearly excited about the upcoming season : “I want to feel useful and important again. I feel that I have the confidence of the staff and that is a good starting point. I have many desires to play and show my talent.”

• Rawr! Cannavaro and the Italian sex bombs visited the national zoo in South Africa last week. Being the captain of the squad and obtaining the special key has obviously made Cannavaro a little confident of his abilities. [Another photo here]
  
• Marcelo says that does not hold a grudge against Greaseano for this incident last December. Instead, he’ll be welcoming SuperTan with open arms in July. “It was all in the heat of the game and completely (expected). I believe we will have a great lifestyle at Real Madrid and I am sure Ronaldo will be a very important addition to our team.” Can you smell what the nightclubs are cooking?
  
• The Maradona-River Plate saga is turning sour by the minute. Ole reports that The Dona has been issued a lawyer’s letter by River’s president asking him to retract or explain his statements. It won’t happen as long as the grandpa is busy changing baby Benjie’s diapers with Gianina.
• Milan are apparently fighting against Oilchester City for Samuel Eto’o's signature. Dear God, please let Uncle Fester Galliani see the light!

You may remember Maradona’s merciless remarks about the state of River Plate’s pitch a few weeks ago. Now, River are biting back! They’re not happy with his controversial statements about his million dollar babies playing in less than perfect conditions.

“It was an unnecessary and gratuitous insult which hurt River and Argentinean football,” said the club’s vice president, Julio Macchi, in a radio interview.

“They were statements that bothered us deeply and they were not in accordance with reality. Maradona must address the national team and think about what (should happen on the field) but he should not be insolent and say things that don’t make sense.”

Uh-oh, we sense a war brewing. Julio and The Dona need to watch Chiquititas together and everything will be just fine!

Thanks to Sol from Argentina for remembering us when she went to La Bombanera to see Boca Juniors in the Copa Libertadores last week! They weren’t able to come off with a win , but we love the photo all the same!

Sadly for Boca, they crushed to another defeat in the hands of Velez Sarsfield yesterday. With the 2-0 loss, Boca sink further down the table to 17th place. Carlos Ischia is in hot water – so if your Sunday team needs a coach, act quickly before the EPL’s Men in Black arrive!

Elsewhere, rivals River Plate claimed a 2-0 victory over Independiente although they’re effectively out of the title race. Watch the goals from Diego Barrado and Falcao García below!

One of the Argentinean superclasicos took place this weekend between River Plate and Boca Juniors. Unfortunately, both teams had to settle for a draw, thanks to goals from Martin Palermo and Gallardo in the second half.

Martin had declared earlier that he “imagined” himself scoring against River. Well, he must’ve thought he was dreaming when the goal sunk into the bottom of the net. Ah, you know that feeling.

Still, nothing changes the fact that they have the most creative fans in the world. Espléndido!

It’s nice to see fans of Los Xeneizes going all out in their support for Riquelme. Half the country appears to be against him now (in favour of Maradona), but he can always rely on Boca fans!

Riquelme steered his side to a 3-0 win over Argentinos Juniors in last night’s Apertura game. Ironically, some of Argentina’s top players – including Riquelme and Maradona – started their own careers at Argentinos Juniors. Boca dominated all 90 minutes of the game and goals from Forlín, Figueroa and Palacio gave them the vital three points needed.

Elsewhere, River Plate drew 1-1 at Vélez. Enjoy the video of the Boca fans celebrating after the game!

Boca Juniors aren’t having the best start to their season as of late, slumping to a 0-2 defeat in the hands of Independiente. They lost three of their last games with star player Riquelme still out due to injury.

In contrast, Boca’s hardcore rivals, River Plate emerged victorious against Arsenal de Sarandí, winning the game 3 goals to 1. Luciano Leguizamón opened the scoring for his team. Interestingly, Arsenal have never won an Apertura championship title.

Lanús now lead the standings with 12 points followed by Vélez and Colón with 11, Gimnasia LP and River with 10 and Arsenal and Huracán with 9 points.

[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-4enz3GaW8]

Remember Shrek and Donkey? Well, of course you do!

River Plate striker Cristian Fabbiani aka “Shrek” has been told to lose weight after he recently tipped the scales at 100kg. Yeah, unbelievable.

“He needs to lose weight. I want him to play ninety minutes – not just half an hour. He needs to lose at least 97% of that extra weight and weigh a few hundred pounds,” said coach Nestor Gorosito.

The Argentinean press loves to call Fabbiani ‘Ogre’ and ‘Shrek’.  In that headline above, “El Hinchado” literally translates to “The Bloated One“. Fabbiani should’ve taken the hint instead of gauging at that backyard barbecue party.

Still, the player insisted that it was his ‘body type’ that was the problem. Whatever the case, you can’t afford to have a 100kg striker wheezing down the field for the ball… it’s a recipe for a joke! Lose weight, hombre!

What a weekend for football rivals! Barcelona lost 1-2 thanks to a dodgy referee decision and Real Madrid smashed 6 goals past Real Betis.

In Argentina, things were no different. River Plate defeated Banfield 2-0 last night while their rivals, Boca Juniors lost 0-1 to Lanús. Riquelme, who is recovering from injury, was a notable omission from the squad.

River Plate didn’t exactly play well but they took all the chances they had. Within 36 minutes of the first half, Abel scored the first goal. Falcao García netted in another goal in the 38th minute, concluding the victory.

Watch the highlights below!

No, your eyes are not playing tricks on you. Shrek and Donkey are on the front cover of the Argentinean newspaper Olé.

The newspaper has compared  Ariel Ortega and Cristian Fabbiani – players who have been closely linked to River Plate in recent days – to the animated characters. In other words, they think Ortega and Fabbiani bear an uncanny resemblance to Shrek and Donkey.

Don’t we all love the Argentinean press?

River had one of the worst seasons in the Argentinean Apertura last year, finishing at the bottom of the table and losing the title twice to Boca Juniors. So perhaps ‘Shrek’ and ‘Donkey’ can help to salvage what’s left..